The Wedding Ceremony
The Wedding Ceremony and the Words of the Officiate
A fusion of souls…
Two people can share a beautiful relationship together
for many years and remain just that – two people.
A wedding changes all this. The wedding is not just a ceremony –
it actually unites the couple into one being. How by introducing a third element
into the relationship that is bigger than both of them – a Divine element.
Through the spiritual traditions performed we create
a bond that is not defined by human limitation,
but rather has the eternity of the Divine.
“What therefore God has joined together let no man separate."
Ceremony Worksheet for
_____________________
Date _______________
Time ___________________
Location ___________________
The Ceremony
The wedding should begin by welcoming your guests
and a call to begin the ceremony.
· AN OPENING PRAYER OR READING
· THE GIVING IN MARRIAGE (optional)
· DEFINITION OF MARRIAGE
· WEDDING VOWS
· READING OR SONG
· EXCHANGE OF RINGS
· UNITY CANDLE & UNITY SAND
· CLOSING
· DECLARATION OF MARRIAGE
· INTRODUCTION OF NEWLYWEDS
Attached you will find samples
of many different types
of Wedding Ceremonies
look around and become inspired.
Worksheet Below
Call to Worship
We are gathered here in the sight of God and these witnesses to unite ___ and ___ in holy matrimony. As followers of Jesus Christ, they believe that God created marriage. In Genesis it says, "It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." ___ and ___, as you prepare to take these vows, give careful thought and prayer, for as you make them you are making an exclusive commitment one to the other for as long as you both shall live. Your love for each other should never be diminished by difficult circumstances, and it is to endure until death parts you. As God's children, your marriage is strengthened by your obedience to your Heavenly Father and His Word. As you let God be in control of your marriage, He will cause your home to be a place of joy and a testimony to the world.
Dearly beloved, we are gathered here in the sight of God, and in the presence of these witnesses, to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony;
which is an honorable estate, instituted of God. It is therefore, not to be entered into unadvisedly, but reverently, discreetly, and in the fear of God. Into this holy estate these two persons come now to be joined.
Dearly beloved, we are gathered here in the presence of God, to join this man and this woman in holy marriage, which is instituted by God, blessed by our Lord Jesus Christ, and to be held in honor among all men. Let us therefore reverently remember that God has established and sanctified marriage, for the welfare and happiness of mankind. Our Savior has instructed that a man shall forsake his father and mother and cleave to his wife. By his apostles, he has instructed those who enter into this relation to cherish a mutual esteem and love, to bear with each other’s infirmities and weaknesses; to comfort each other in sickness, trouble, and sorrow; in honesty and industry to provide for each other and for their household in temporal things; to pray for and encourage each other in the things which pertain to God;
and to live together as heirs of the grace of life.
Dear friends and family, with great affection for ___ and ___
we have gathered together to witness and bless their union in marriage.
To this sacred moment they bring the fullness of their hearts as a treasure and a gift from God to share with one another. They bring the dreams which bind them together in an eternal commitment. They bring their gifts and talents, their unique personalities and spirits, which God will unite together into one being as they build their life together. We rejoice with them in thankfulness to the Lord for creating this union of hearts, built on friendship, respect and love.
The Giving In Marriage(optional)
"Who gives this woman to be wedded to this man"
"Who supports this couple in their marriage?" or
"Who supports this woman in her marriage to this man?"
OPENING PRAYER OR READING (optional)
This will set the tone of your wedding. It could be serious, humorous, sentimental, or elegant.
Wedding Readings from Books & Novels
Romantic Wedding Readings From Fiction and Literature
From "The Velveteen Rabbit" by Margery Williams
"What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?" "Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real." "Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit. "Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt." "Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?" "It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."
From "The Irrational Season" by Madeleine L'Engle
But ultimately there comes a moment when a decision must be made. Ultimately two people who love each other must ask themselves how much they hope for as their love grows and deepens, and how much risk they are willing to take…It is indeed a fearful gamble…Because it is the nature of love to create, a marriage itself is something which has to be created, so that, together we become a new creature.
To marry is the biggest risk in human relations that a person can take…If we commit ourselves to one person for life this is not, as many people think, a rejection of freedom; rather it demands the courage to move into all the risks of freedom, and the risk of love which is permanent; into that love which is not possession, but participation…It takes a lifetime to learn another person…When love is not possession, but participation, then it is part of that co-creation which is our human calling, and which implies such risk that it is often rejected.
From "Gift From The Sea" by Anne Morrow Lindbergh
When you love someone, you do not love them all the time, in exactly the same way, from moment to moment. It is an impossibility. It is even a lie to pretend to. And yet this is exactly what most of us demand. We have so little faith in the ebb and flow of life, of love, of relationships. We leap at the flow of the tide and resist in terror its ebb. We are afraid it will never return. We insist on permanency, on duration, on continuity; when the only continuity possible, in life as in love, is in growth, in fluidity - in freedom, in the sense that the dancers are free, barely touching as they pass, but partners in the same pattern.
The only real security is not in owning or possessing, not in demanding or expecting, not in hoping, even. Security in a relationship lies neither in looking back to what was in nostalgia, nor forward to what it might be in dread or anticipation, but living in the present relationship and accepting it as it is now. Relationships must be like islands, one must accept them for what they are here and now, within their limits - islands, surrounded and interrupted by the sea, and continually visited and abandoned by the tides.
Wedding Readings from the Bible
Classic Biblical Passages on Love and Marriage
Song of Solomon 2:10-13
My beloved responded and said to me, Arise, my darling, my beautiful one,
And come along. 'For behold, the winter is past, The rain is over and gone. 'The flowers have already appeared in the land; The time has arrived for pruning the vines, And the voice of the turtledove has been heard in our land.
'The fig tree has ripened its figs, And the vines in blossom have given forth their fragrance. Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, And come along!'
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up. Furthermore, if two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone? And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart.
Ruth 1:16-17
But Ruth said, "Do not urge me to leave you or turn back from following you; for where you go, I will go, and where you lodge, I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God, my God. "Where you die, I will die, and there I will be buried. Thus may the LORD do to me, and worse, if anything but death parts you and me."
I Corinthians 13:1-13
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
I John 4:7-19
Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.
The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love. By this the love of God was manifested in us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him. In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has seen God at any time; if we love one another, God abides in us, and His love is perfected in us. By this we know that we abide in Him and He in us, Because He has given us of His Spirit. We have seen and testify that the Father has sent the Son To be the Savior of the world. Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God. We have come to know and have believed the love which God has for us God is love, and the one who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.
By this, love is perfected with us, so that we may have confidence in the Day of Judgment; because as He is, so also are we in this world. There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love. We love, because He first loved us.
DEFINITION OF MARRIAGE
Here the officiate says some words about marriage the seriousness of the solemn vow you are about to make, and the new life together you are creating.
DEFINITION OF MARRIAGE (choose what fits for your ceremony)
Wedding ceremonies were a well-established tradition in both Jewish history and in Biblical times. Scripture is clear about marriage being a holy and divinely established covenant. Today we have come together so that____________ and ________ may be joined in marriage.
Marriage is an act of faith and a personal commitment as well as a moral and physical union between the parties. Marriage has been described as the best and most important relationship that can exist between two human beings; the construction of their love and trust into a single growing energy of spiritual life, it is a moral commitment that requires and deserves daily attention since no earthly happiness exceeds that of a reciprocal satisfaction in the conjugal state. Marriage should be a life-long consecration to the ideal of loving kindness, backed with the will to make it last.
Matrimony symbolizes the ultimate intimacy between a man and a woman; yet this closeness should not diminish but strengthen the individuality of each partner. A marriage that lasts is one that always has a little more to grow.
WEDDING VOWS
I, (Bride/Groom), take you (Groom/Bride), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.
I, (name), take you, (name), to be my [opt: lawfully wedded] (husband/wife), my constant friend, my faithful partner and my love from this day forward. In the presence of God, our family and friends, I offer you my solemn vow to be your faithful partner in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as in sorrow. I promise to love you unconditionally, to support you in your goals, to honor and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, and to cherish you for as long as we both shall live.
I (name), take you (name) to be my (husband/wife), my partner in life and my one true love. I will cherish our union and love you more each day than I did the day before. I will trust you and respect you, laugh with you and cry with you, loving you faithfully through good times and bad, regardless of the obstacles we may face together. I give you my hand, my heart, and my love, from this day forward for as long as we both shall live.
In the presence of God and these our friends I take thee to be my husband/wife, promising with Divine assistance to be unto thee a loving and faithful husband/wife so long as we both shall live.
I, (name), take you, (name), to be my friend, my lover, the (mother/father) of my children and my (husband/wife). I will be yours in times of plenty and in times of want, in times of sickness and in times of health, in times of joy and in times of sorrow, in times of failure and in times of triumph. I promise to cherish and respect you, to care and protect you, to comfort and encourage you, and stay with you, for all eternity.
I, [name], choose you [name] to be my [husband/wife], to respect you in your successes and in your failures, to care for you in sickness and in health, to nurture you, and to grow with you throughout the seasons of life.
I, (name), take you, (name), to be my partner, loving what I know of you, and trusting what I do not yet know. I eagerly anticipate the chance to grow together, getting to know the (man/woman) you will become, and falling in love a little more every day. I promise to love and cherish you through whatever life may bring us.
READING OR SONG(optional)
Songs for Weddings Couples often choose to have a special song sung or played during the wedding ceremony.
The love song is often sung by a soloist. However, choirs, congregational songs, and instrumentals are also used throughout the ceremony.
EXCHANGE OF RINGS
The Exchange of the Wedding Rings
It is traditional for a couple to exchange wedding rings after they say their vows.
Since these rings are symbols of the marriage, the words said during a ring exchange should reflect the couple's hopes for their marriage. These words may be simply incorporated into the wedding vows, or treated as a separate ritual.
Here is some example wording to use during your ring exchange or ring ceremony:
· I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and faithfulness. As I place it on your finger, I commit my heart and soul to you. I ask you to wear this ring as a reminder of the vows we have spoken today, our wedding day.
· This ring is a token of my love. I marry you with this ring, with all that I have and all that I am Response: I will forever wear this ring as a sign of my commitment and the desire of my heart.
· I give you this ring to wear with love and joy. As a ring has no end, neither shall my love for you. I choose you to be my (wife / husband) this day and forevermore.
· This ring I give to you as a token of my love and devotion to you. I pledge to you all that I am and all that I will ever be as your (husband/wife). With this ring, I gladly marry you and join my life to yours.
· I give this ring as my gift to you. Wear it and think of me and know that I love you."
· I give you this ring in God's name, as a symbol of all that we have promised and all that we shall share.
· I give you this ring as a visible and constant symbol of my promise to be with you as long as I live.
· I give you this ring as a symbol of my love for you. Let it be a reminder that I am always with you
· I give you this ring as a symbol of my love, my faith in our strength together, and my covenant to learn and grow with you.
· Let this ring be a symbol of my promises to you and a reminder of my devotion to you. I am honored to call you my _______
· With this ring, I thee wed, and with it, I bestow upon thee all the treasures of my mind, heart, and hands.
· I give you this ring as a symbol of my love. As it encircles your finger, may it remind you always that you are surrounded by my enduring love. Response: I will wear it gladly. Whenever I look at it, I will remember this joyous day & the vows we made.
· I have for you a golden ring. The most precious metal symbolizes that your love is the most precious element in my life. The ring has no beginning and no ending, which symbolizes that the love between us will never cease. I place it on your finger as a visible sign of the vows which have made us husband and wife.
· Because this ring is perfectly symmetrical, it signifies the perfection of true love. As I place it on your finger, I give you all that I am and ever hope to be. Response: Because this ring has no end or beginning, it signifies the continuation of true love. As I place it on your finger, I give you all that I am and ever hope to be.
Religious Vows for the Ring Ceremony
I give you this ring as a symbol of my love; and with all that I am and all that I have, I honor you, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.
(Name), I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow, and with all that I am and all that I have, I honor you, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.
This ring I give you, in token and pledge of our constant faith and abiding love.
In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, take and wear this ring as sign of my love and faithfulness.
I give you this ring as a sign of my love and faithfulness. Receive this ring as a token of wedded love and faith.
I give you this ring as a sign of my vow, and with all that I am, and all that I have; I honor you in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
LIGHTING OF UNITY CANDLE ORUNITY SAND CEREMONY (optional)
Many couples are choosing to add a unity ceremony. They may choose to do this in silence, with music playing or they may create vows to say about the joining of their families.
Lighting of the Unity Candle
A candle-lighting service can be a very meaningful part of your service. One option is to have no interpretation of your act, just the candle lighting. However, think through what you want it to symbolize.
Sample
The candles which ________ and ________ now light represents the coming together of their two lives in a marriage relationship. Their two individual candles continue burning. In the same way, ________ and ________
will continue to be two unique individuals in the midst of their marriage.
Sample
The two outside candles have been lighted to represent both your lives in this moment. They are two distinct lights, each capable of going their separate ways. As you join now in marriage, there is a merging of these two lights into one light. This is what the Lord meant when He said, "On this account a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall be one flesh." From now on your thoughts shall be for each other rather than your individual selves. Your plans shall be mutual, your joys and sorrows shall be shared alike.
As you each take a candle and together light the center one, you will extinguish your own candles, thus letting the center candle represent the union of your lives into one flesh. As this one light cannot be divided, neither shall your lives be divided but a united testimony in a Christian home. May the radiance of this one light be a testimony of your unity in the Lord Jesus Christ.
UNITY SAND CEREMONY
The unity sand ceremony follows a similar principle as the unity candle, but instead of sparking a flame,
the couple creates an artistic masterpiece by pouring different colored sand into a unity vase.
The Unity Sand Ceremony is known all over the world for its beauty and sanctity.
Couples add this ceremony to their weddings as an alternative to the unity candle ceremony
the sand captures the meaning of their two lives becoming one.
And it creates a lasting keepsake of that special day.
Using different colored wedding sands, the bride and groom each take turns filling a Unity Vase
as they recite their chosen vows.
CLOSING
This could be a poem, a prayer, or a sanctioning of the marriage.
It is generally the "final thoughts" of the officiate.
Wedding Ceremonies: The Closing Words
The words you pick for the ending of the service, like all the service, depend on personal preference. Here are some examples of what are variously called closing words, blessings, prayers, or benedictions.
Most gracious God, we give you thanks for your tender love in sending Jesus Christ to come among us, to be born of a human mother, and to make the way of the cross to be the way of life. We thank you, also, for consecrating the union of man and woman in his Name. By the power of your Holy Spirit, pour out the abundance of your blessing upon this man and woman. Defend them from every enemy. Lead them into all peace. Let their love for each other be a seal upon their hearts, a mantle about their shoulders, and a crown upon their foreheads. Bless them in their work and in their companionship; in their sleeping and in their waking; in their joys and in their sorrows; in their life and in their death. Finally, in your mercy, bring them to that table where your saints feast forever in your heavenly home; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who with you and the Holy Spirit lives and reigns, one God, forever and ever. Amen.
O God, you have so consecrated the covenant of marriage that in it is represented the spiritual unity between Christ and his Church: Send therefore your blessing upon these your servants, that they may so love, honor, and cherish each other in faithfulness and patience, in wisdom and true godliness, that their home may be a haven of blessing and peace; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and forever. Amen.
God the Father, God the Son, God the Holy Spirit, bless, preserve, and keep you; the Lord mercifully with his favor look upon you, and fill you with all spiritual benediction and grace; that you may faithfully live together in this life, and in the age to come have life everlasting. Amen.
Officiate - The peace of the Lord be always with you. People - And also with you. Amen.
Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be shelter to the other.
Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be warmth to the other.
Now you will feel no loneliness, for each of you will be a companion to the other.
Now you are two bodies, but there is only one life before you.
Go now to your dwelling place, to enter the days of your life together.
And may your days be good, and long upon the earth. Amen.
Now may you depart in peace, May your love cast out small fears,
May your hope endure. May your faith in each other and in this radiant universe in which the mystery of love happens grow and flourish. Amen.
Out of this tangled world two souls have come together, drawn by mutual love and respect.
May their days and years yet unborn deepen the joy of their choice and make it abidingly true. Amen.
May these two find happiness in their union. May they live faithfully together, performing the vow and covenant they have made between them; and may they ever remain in sympathy and understanding: that their years may be rich in the joys of life, and their days good, and long upon the earth. Amen.
May this moment gleam eternally in your lives. May it add glory to every achievement and cast a blessed light over any ill fortune that may appear. May you give vitality to each other in all undertakings. May you care for each other in all sadness. May you give cheer to each other as you each care for the sacred passion of love. May all that is virtuous, beautiful and trustworthy, remain with you always. Amen.
DECLARATION OF MARRIAGE
"By the power vested in me by the State of Florida,
I now pronounce you husband and wife"
"You may kiss the bride" or
"you may now kiss each other."
INTRODUCTION OF NEWLYWEDS
"I present to you Mr. and Mrs. ________"
or "I present to you the newly married couple, ____________"
The Ceremony
Ceremony Worksheet for ___________________
Date: ______________ Time: __________
Location: __________________________________
The wedding should begin by welcoming your guests and a call to begin the ceremony.
· AN OPENING PRAYER OR READING
_________________________________
· THE GIVING IN MARRIAGE (optional)
· DEFINITION OF MARRIAGE
· WEDDING VOWS
_________________________________
· READING OR SONG
· EXCHANGE OF RINGS
_________________________________
_________________________________
· UNITY CANDLE & UNITY SAND
· CLOSING
_________________________________
· DECLARATION OF MARRIAGE
__________________________
· INTRODUCTION OF NEWLYWEDS
_________________________
“What therefore God has joined together let no man separate.” Mark 10:9
YOUR Wedding IDEAS
Now join your hands, and with your hands your hearts.
William Shakespeare